Sunday, 24 January 2010

The Beautiful Mind?

Is the name of a conference I am going to in March; I have often wondered whether the Mind is, in fact beautiful. Whether that is because my mind has so often launched attacks on itself, let me down and taken me to some dark and dangerous places.
I often find myself speaking of my mind as a separate entity - and that is because it has so often felt like it is not my own. I have felt as if someone or something lurks in my mind, waiting to strike whenever I let my guard down.
At the same time, it amazes me that despite the desperate times when my mind has turned against me, it also allows me to live, laugh, love, write and read. It can keep me connected to the world as much as it can carry me away into its' own recesses.
The conference is a to help me in my work with ThinkTwice. It is still so much still in the planning stages and yet the passion I have has not wavered. I was reminded again today that God promises to restore the years lost. In Joel it talks of restoring the years the locusts have eaten. I feel as though my teenage years were stolen from me, I was stripped to someone unrecognisable from the child I was, and the woman I am becoming.
I am, after drowning in life and retreating from it, finally dipping my toes in the water again. I am living again. And you know what? It feels really good.

Monday, 18 January 2010

When it is dark can see stars

It has been quite a while since I last blogged - in fact it was last year! I have been challenged again and again recently to actually DO something about the passion I have for mental health awareness and support. Part of me knows they are almost selfish reasons - I do not want what I have suffered to have been in vain. There has to be a reason I have gone through the last six years.
I also know I have been blessed with a compassionate heart. I want to help those people who are struggling - I want to come alongside them, cry with them, make them smile and make a difference - showing a little bit of God's love to them that might just bring them before the Lord for the first time. Some might term it a 'call', I term it as the thing that makes my heart hammer and want so much to make a difference.
Being at college, I have come to see that I am not alone in what I have struggled with, and I want to help other people know that they are not alone. No two experiences are ever the same, but there is much to be learnt from the joys and sorrows of others.
I have a work in progress when it comes to this idea. An organisation, group, whatever it may be called 'Think Twice' which aims to get alongside people, advocate for them, pray with them and for them and raise awareness that 'mental illness' can affect the 'normal' looking school girl as well as the muttering man so many people cross the street to avoid.
So, you know what? If you fancy getting involved - praying, doing, whatever you can or want to do...drop me a line at I would really love to hear from you!
In the mean time...may God really bless you as you face whatever this new week may hold for you.